DID YOU EXPECT TO GRADUATE COLLEGE AND GET A REASONABLE JOB IN YOUR FIELD-- WITHOUT PULLING YOURSELF UP BY YOUR BOOTSTRAPS FIRST?
ARE YOU CURRENTLY «KILLING» OUTDATED LUXURY INDUSTRIES SUCH AS DIAMONDS & GOLF & APPLEBEES BY YOUR LACK OF ECONOMIC SUPPORT BECAUSE YOU'D RATHER SPEND YOUR MONEY ON SOUL CRUSHING STUDENT DEBT?
DO YOU NOT REALIZE IF YOU STOPPED SPENDING $12 A WEEK ON FANCY COFFEE DRINKS & AVOCADO TOAST BRUNCH YOU COULD AFFORD TO BUY A HOME IN 160 YEARS?
IF YOU ANSWERED THE QUESTIONS, CONGRATS MILLENNIAL. IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW OR IF YOU ANSWERED-- ALL PARTICIPANTS WILL RECEIVE A COMPLIMENTARY PARTICIPATION AWARD 🥇 EMOJIS ARE SO RELATABLE — 🙌😸🙌👎☠️🤞😺🤞👹👊🏻👹👊🏻👹STOP LOOKING AT YOUR PHONE AND GO OUTSIDE BUT FIRST HELP ME WITH A TECHNOLOGY RELATED QUESTION
— Help Grandma with Google (deciphering borderline nonsensical technological descriptions as described by older adults)
— Social Media Terminology
— Adulting & Selfies & other stupid words
— Best things to Binge on Netflix
— omg Drake is my favorite rapper (popular music)
— Send Nudes (Dating in 2017)
— Alternative Emoji Uses (💦🍆)
— Tattoo Terminology
— Internships & Other Empty Promises
— 90s/2000s Nostalgia
Drink specials include:
— cheap beer cans that are suddenly cool to drink again $1.50
— a random IPA $3
— new old fashioned manhattan — bourbon / sweet vermouth / artisanal housemade bitters made in a 1920s reclaimed wood organic wifi amazon prime day / orange curaçao / cherry / pumpkin spice / cold press coffee / $5
Winning team gets a $50 Yuzu Gift Card and a temporary escape to short-term happiness.